Posts tagged training for marathon
Audacious Faith and Running Another Marathon
Last night I was on a hot quick three mile jog and was struggling through the hot miles and my sore muscles from Saturday's long run. Here I am again attempting to train for another marathon.

I came across my old marathon training vlogs and think I am going to try and make those again, even though I am already 4 weeks in. This time I feel like I am in some sort of delusional fog about it. Maybe it's because I have done it before, I actually know that my body can travel such distance.

Those last 6 miles were killer for me, I definitely "hit the wall" but I got across that finish line.

Here is the thing, I am totally training this time on faith, one run at a time. I know there are runners of all shapes and sizes, but sometimes as I am running I feel like I am an unlikely candidate to be a marathoner.

Only 6 months ago I was recovering from two dislocated knees that had me even unable to take care of my kids, and even though I had lost quite a bit since having my son last August I am still quite a bit over where I would like to be. Regardless it's a lot of weight to lug around on long runs and a bum knee.

On one of my first weeks on a short run my knee was killing me, the same day I decided to step out in faith and sign up for and PAY for the marathon on Aug 17. I was having strong doubts that my knee would make it that day, but I just told the Lord that I would trust Him one run at a time.

This is one thing He has been showing me, that we only have this day we are in. Why worry and stress in how we are going to get to three months from now, that bridge will come in time. This is the same for running. How am I going to run 20 miles in several weeks? I don't know, but I don't have to run 20 miles today. Today it may be 3, or 5, seemingly insignificant in comparison, but many times its the insignificant things that get you to the super significant. The day in and day out.

The thing is, it is harder some days more than others. Somedays I feel amazing and fast, others day I feel like I have to tell my body "listen I am the one in charge here." And I guess this is one of the many reasons training for a marathon is such a picture of me that parallels my faith.  It is such a big feat that the idea paralyzes most people, surely my body couldn't do that. But that is faith, "being sure of what you hope for and certain of what you do not see". I don't see myself as that "runner" girl, and yet I have run on and off for four years. What I like about it is that I am unlikely, that I have something inside me that others may not recognize, that on most days, I don't recognize and it's this really tangible way to see it.

Believing again for that next run when you were hurting pretty bad from the last one, and then having an amazing run. That fight, that spirit inside that says, "I am going to try again". 

So much like life, I may not look the part, I may not be the best, or fastest, but I am here, I am alive, and I am going to give everything I have to do something because through Christ, all things are possible. It's not so much about all that, it's about making it through something you weren't sure was possible, and your faith is another muscle fatigued stronger that next time.

Marathon Anxiety
OK I am having super anxiety about my running, so I thought I would write about it in order to get it out of me...I HOPE! 

This past week has been super hard for me, I think the hardest of all my training, mostly mentally or psychologically. I am sure it was a combination of a lot of things but it makes me nervous. For one, that 20 mile run took its toll on me. I have been exhausted all week, but more than that...because I ended it walking and feeling defeated by it, I feel mentally and physically unprepared to run the full marathon. I ran 4.5 on Sunday and had 8 on Tuesday, which I could also BARELY finish. 

I have been sick since Easter with this cough, congestion sickness, and I assume running in all kinds of weather while being sick has not helped this at all. Thankfully, the cough doesn't feel as in my lungs and chest as it has this morning, but I was wondering if it might have been Bronchitis because one of the symptoms of that (according to the all knowing internet) is lethargy...which I felt ALL week.

I have read as many articles about the whole thing as I can find and asked my marathon running friend about her advice in attempts to ease my fears. The overall message I am getting is that it's the ramping up of the miles previously that is what really matters and that missing or shortening runs during tapering won't matter too much to the actual race. But it still scares me, a lot!

I think for me, it is just the unknown, and also that I feel burnt out. I am not sure if it was the 20 miles that did it to me and being out there on my feet for four and half hours or what, but it was like my subconscious was like "OK, you finished your 20..time to relax, you are DONE!" but I am far from done. "Uhh hello self, remember that 26.2 you still have to run that you have been training ALL this time for!!??"

It's freaking me out. I decided to take one day off of training this week, a 4 mile run...but in my head I feel like I have given up altogether. How does that make any sense? I still walked 3 miles that day and felt exhausted that evening. I vacillate in my mind between never wanting to run again and being afraid I won't be able to ever finish another run like I want to.

Feel the fear and do it anyway!
Today I have a 12 mile run scheduled. I have to wait till my husband gets off work {thus this nervous energy being poured out into this blog post} and then its supposed to be a good 70 degrees today. I feel better, not completley, but I feel like I have to get back out there for this run to prove to myself that all this training I have matters, my body is conditioned, and my mind needs to believe that.

My training is cut down more this week, but I still have at least 4 runs coming up next week as well, and I know there is a purpose in them so I have to focus. 

I can get to the start line of that race, it is only 2 weeks away, I have trained for 14...I can not let my fear of failure paralyze me. I think this is a pattern in my life. If I can't do it, why try? But how will I know unless I do try? I need to give myself permission that doing my best is what I expect from myself...not a full 26.2 of absolutely no walking. I would love that, but my pride will come more from getting my body to cross that finish line one way or the other, that is what I can be proud of myself for matter if I have to struggle to do it.

My life the last few months


And I think I see this in comparison to my life. I feel like if it gets too hard, or I am not going to be good at it, possibly embarrass myself, or even worse I have lied to myself about being able to do something I really never could, that I would just rather not try. But that is not what life is about. Life is about taking risks, having faith, believing again, trusting in those things that are hard, and learning, living and loving the process as well as the finishing. 

I need to remember that I can already be proud for even getting to this point. That overcoming and getting through this mental battle of somewhere in my heart wanting to quit because I don't trust myself, ability, or God to get me essential. 

Marathon Training VLOG {20 Miles}
Hey all,
Sorry for being MIA. I have been really buckling down with marathon training and am SOOOO tired! But I finished my 20 miles on Saturday, BARELY....but I did! I am also excited to be entering tapering now...less than 3 weeks till the big day.
Here is my before and after the run faces...ha ha
Here is my latest vlog if you don't mind hearing me drone on a bit about my 20 mile adventure:)